As I sit here to write this article, I have no drive! Just putting my fingers to the keys took a good ten minutes, not only because I did not know what I was going to write about, but also because I lacked the drive. Drive is a hell of a thing, as it is a two-edged sword that can make or break you. With it you feel unconquerable and without it, you are an empty vessel. At this point in my life, I am feeling like the latter, and here’s why:
I’m trying to get my life out of a rut…
A few months ago my business partner and I had to suspend operations at our restaurant company for the unforeseeable future. This was due to a series of unfortunate events. However, since we ceased operations in August, it has been a continuous trek to survive. From seeking private sector jobs to scrambling to pay the bills, life has made a complete 360 for us. We were on top, young Entrepreneurs setting trends, making moves and bootstrapping a business from scratch. From that pinnacle we fell very hard, having to move from NYC to rural Florida and searching for any type of jobs we can find to make ends meet. To be honest, this has made me very resilient, humble and determined to make a great comeback. But, it has also dampened my drive. It is a daily struggle to stay positive, avoid the negative and look forward. It is not easy but I am pressing on as I know this is just a learning curve on the journey to success.
Working for someone else, and not for myself has made me lazy…
In the good old days when our business was booming, we had to be coming up with ideas everyday on how to make the business work, how to get our name out there, build a brand, etc. Now…working for someone else, I am subjected to a daily “same-shit-different-day” scenario which is monotonous and repetitive. Running your own business provides a daily challenge and that can make it interesting or frustrating, which is all part of the fun. However, when you are working for someone else, following their orders, visions and policies, you are like a Hamster on a spinning wheel. Going around in circles, no change, no gain, no challenge. You can never build muscle doing the same exercise reps everyday, and life is the same thing. If you are not being challenged mentally everyday, then your drive goes out the window. This is how I am feeling right now!
Motivational songs, speakers, videos and books, help; but only for a while…
This morning I woke up and started playing some inspirational music from the likes of Mary Mary, Kirk Franklin, Beyonce and Mary J. Blige. I bobbed, sang along and overall felt great within the moment. But then, after a while I started to go back into the same lull. I am not depressed nor am I overly stressed, however, I have so many ideas that I want to pursue. Ideas that can provide my next big breakthrough and get me back on track, but with no money to make them happen, its just not possible right now and this frustrates me. But, in all of this I am learning patience and humility and even though the negative forces are trying to take away my drive, I am still fighting on. So I will continue to listen my motivational music and speeches every now and then, even if they just help in the moment.
Life is full of adventure, some of those experiences are exciting, and others are demotivating. However, I have learnt over the past few months, that time is the master, and if we are persistent, faithful and patient, anything is within our reach. I will continue to search for my drive daily, as it is a never ending struggle; and when I do find it I will juice it for all its got. Until that time comes again, where I will have to search for another.
Do you have drive?
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